Hot mess was a term that was used in reference to my life more than once and more than once by myself, about myself. For years I felt that there would always be at least one area in my life that would be a mess or at least look like a mess from the outside (which equals stress in my world). And even if I managed to get all my ducks in a row for a moment, they quickly began to waddle off and make some sort of mess, a big ducking mess.

While things are often still not where I'd like for them to be, the mess is no longer unmanageable, its expected. I can spot the messiness creeping in and do something to change that, things move slower and are more predictable, like now I have turtles in a row. I now know that by acknowledging the mess and the uncomfortable that I am slowly cleaning it up and that maybe one day it won't be a challenge to keep in order, it will be part of my routine, a healthy habit.

My old habit of ignoring the mess, running from it, blaming someone or something for it, shoving it in the closet, under the bed, hiring someone to deal with it or stressing over what people will think about my messiness, is slowly being let go. By taking a good look at my mess and working to declutter and reorganize my daily life, I now see all of my mess as a beautiful work in progress. I now see this messiness as an opportunity for growth and change, which to me makes my mess beautiful.