You Cannot Hack Health and Wellness.

I have seen numerous articles with some sort of "10 Simple Weight Loss Hacks" type of title. While these articles usually have great tips that will in fact contribute to weight loss, the term hack does not sit well with me. These articles fall in line with any sort of "Lose Weight Fast" or even worse "Lose 30 lbs in 30 Days" type articles and I have had enough.

First off, it is unhealthy to lose weight really fast because in order to do so you have to go to extremes, both in your calorie intake and in your exercise intensity and duration. Even further, these extreme measures are not able to be maintained long term, resulting in very short term weight loss (most of which is water and muscle loss). Who the hell wants to do all of that work for such a short pay off?? I know who, individuals that have bought into the instant gratification nonsensical bullshit that our society has pushed on everyone. From weight loss to get rich quick schemes, everyone is looking for the short cut, the magic pill, the fat sucking wrap or machine, the money back guarantee for their happiness. 

When it comes to losing weight there is a way to use magic to your advantage. When you decide that you are going to make changes in order to lose weight and feel better about yourself, you discover other wonderful changes that start to happen in your life. Even more, when you decide to approach your weight loss goals with love and kindness, aiming to make your life richer and more fulfilling, magical things start to happen. You start to try new things, new foods, new forms of activity. You start to feel more comfortable in your own skin, glowing with confidence and smiling from the inside out. You start to have more energy and less sickness, enabling you to experience more things. You start to meet new people that share this love of choosing fun and rejuvenating activities over ones that simply involve eating and drinking. Most of all you start to develop a serious sense of self-love that opens the door to a new and wonderful way of living life. If you use these new experiences as your daily dose of inspiration, your weight will start to disappear, like magic.

 

When You're Forced to Slow Down

We set goals, we plan ahead to make sure we reach those goals and then something happens that forces us to slow down. A car accident, an injury, a major life or relationship change, or an ill family member. All of these are very serious things that deserve some undivided attention but also things that can derail your fitness journey, among other types of journeys. 

As I've said before, personal trainers are not immune to this derailment and while my only current fitness goal is do a cartwheel on my birthday for the rest of my life, I experience situations that keep me from moving forward in life on the regular. I was recently instructed by my doctor to do very limited exercise for the past two weeks due to some pesky migraine issues I have been suffering. At first I did the standard reaction of pitching a fit and complaining that my doctor didn't seem understand what yoga was and that telling people that exercise is the problem for health issues was completely ass backwards and the problem with our societal health issues. However... after the full two weeks I am of course able to reflect and more clearly see the big picture. 

While I am still having some of the same pains as before, I have had significantly less migraine issues. And while the two week break didn't solve the problem it did open my eyes to the ever so obvious realization that I am not in control. There is a bigger plan for me and my life and the path that I deem as the most beneficial and efficient may not be the path I am suppose to take. Maybe I am meant to learn something very valuable along my detour. Maybe I am suppose to trust that I have not left my original path for good or that maybe the new path will take me to something even greater than where I was headed. I know to some this might sound a little too woo woo, but the main take away from my experience of being forced to slow down is that I am not in control.  

AS a result, I have been looking at this concept of control and found that I actually try to control lots of things in my life. I have always heard the term "Control Freak" and it never resinated with me, thinking "I am such a free spirit that actually needs more control in life, not less". I was wrong. After looking at daily actions and seeing control pop up in situations like how I like the house to be cleaned, the pups to be taken care of, my opinions of how others in my life should be doing things, I began to see it everywhere.

Then, I heard my yoga teacher explain that the need for control is simply a lack of trust, and that flipped everything for me. I do not want to live my life with a lack of trust. I do not want to take on the stress of what others do or don't do and of how they do it. When I find myself in a moment of wanting to take control, I have begun taking a moment to see where my lack of trust is stemming from in the situation. Most times it is rather silly and I can start to move past the need. I am announcing to the world that I trust that everything will get done, I trust that what is in store for me, good or bad, is what I need at the moment, I trust that those around me will also find this trust in their path and that we can all rest happy together in the end.

How to Reverse Aging

I was recently watching a Gabor Mate interview, where he discussed the concept of reversing aging. After discussing our current society's obsession of trying to look as young as possible and pointing out the extra stress and challenges that trying to look young places upon us, he said the most unexpected and amazing thing. He followed with his recommendation for reversing aging... let it go! By letting go of emotional baggage we revert back to a more child like version of ourselves. By letting go of expectations that we have created in our head, we find more room to laugh and play. By letting go of trying to keep up with the Jones' on social media, we tap into OUR true selves and not the versions we think we are supposed to be, which results in a lot less stress and a lot more joy. 

I challenge you to find one thing, big or small, that you will let go of over the next few days. Tell a friend or family member so that it feels real and then let that shit go! Inhale... and exhale. Notice if you find yourself with a little less pressure or pain and then do something that you use to love as a kid. Go for a bike ride, play hopscotch, pick up a hula hoop, shoot some hoops, watch your favorite movie from your childhood with your family, play dress up, dance like you're 8 years old and you don't yet care about your dance moves, anything. Just find some more space for fun and turn back the clock. Keep doing this over and over, and your soul won't look a day over 20.

The Concern for Looking Good

Along my recent self-care journey I have learned to notice when I am participating in acts of harm instead of love and kindness. This has become evident when I am driving in the car and someone makes an unsafe move that in my eyes is extremely selfish and just out-right rude. I notice unkind thoughts when I see people who may or may not look like they are going to the club while at the gym and hog equipment. I feel these icky and entitled feelings when I witness someone who has clearly not yet taken any time to grow and evolve out of their current self destructive states, yet continue to complain about there situation. The craziest thing about this is that I too have done all of these things many times. Well, maybe not so much the full make up and coordinated outfits for working out, but I have planned special socks or my favorite shirt when I have chosen to show up (and blow up) at CrossFit. #subucrossfit

The more and more I break down these acts of unkindness, the more and more noticeable they become, the most shocking of which is when I am unkind to myself. The most recent example of this was while I was at the gym working out. I was warming up on the treadmill planning my workout, and in my head I was saying things like "Well, since you had extra alcohol and junk foods over the holiday weekend, you need to move your fat ass and really get after it," and "Ugh, I feel so bloated and squishy, go faster!!!", and "Why the hell did you eat beer cheese?".  As I was saying these unkind things to myself, it dawned on me that I would never speak to any of my clients in this manner, so why did I think it was acceptable to do so to myself?

It all comes back to a little concept that I learned in yoga teacher training last month, the concern for looking good.  This doesn't specifically mean in a physical manner, although this is how I noticed it this particular time. What this concept really means is the fear of not living up to standards, the fear of not looking like a professional, the fear of looking stupid or clueless, the fear of messing up, the fear of not looking like I have my shit together 24/7. If you dial back most things that we do not enjoy or that we come at in an unkind way, you will probably find some sort of concern for looking good.

When it comes to my body and my body image, I have good body image. I have things that I wish I could have removed, lasered, plumped, hoisted, and smoothed but when I get hung up on these things I take a moment to appreciate the good. I am beyond grateful that my body shows up every morning and works hard for me everyday. I have now fostered a love of taking care of my body and making changes, sacrifices, and time to reward it for all of that hard work. So what's the big deal then? Why so unkind to myself?

Well, even though I know about this little concept, it doesn't mean that I don't still struggle with it, I will forever be a work in progress. My hang up is in comparing myself to the self imposed standards of being a personal trainer, standards that I automatically assume people are thinking when I'm in a bathing suit. I get caught in the same traps as others, wishing for different and stressing about being good enough. I beat myself up when I stray from my plan and I go overboard sometimes to "regain balance". The best part of this is that I now notice when it happens. I recognize the nastiness and I snap myself out of it rather quickly. By taking the time to check in and ask myself why I'm having particular thoughts I am able to get one step closer to preventing them from happening. I remind myself that we are all one, no one person better or worse than another, we are all equal as well as amazing in our own right. This might sound hookie and earthy-crunchy but I double dog dare you to start to look for unkind words, whether to yourself or others. Once you begin to see it you can change it.

"Experiencing our body through our ego's eyes will always kick up feelings of inadequacy and separateness."  - Gabby Bernstein 

Mind/Body Compass - Learn to Listen

After my Summer of Self Care, I took a moment to reflect on how it went. Did anything change? Do I feel any different? I concluded that I do feel different. I feel a little bit more in control of my emotions (anxiety, depression, PMS!!, hangriness, dumb-male-syndrome, exhaustion, and others). How bizarre is it that some bubble baths, yoga classes, candles, peppy playlists and healthy mantras have actually changed the way I feel on a daily basis?

Learning to give my body what it needs gave me the power to change the outlook on my day. It gave me the power to help my mood not be sooo shitty. It gave me the power to calm myself when needed. It gave me the power to know that I can make myself happy. Now, this is nowhere near a completely honed skill, it is simply me understanding that I have the power to make myself feel better if need be. I can at least lessen the burden if not completely change my day.

The simple act of tapping into my thoughts, my body, and my mind on a regular basis and trying to measure how I am feeling has allowed me to add or subtract things that may help my day go in a more balanced manner. For example, if I’m anxious about a new client I can make sure to add in a meditation before their session. If I’m exhausted from a long day I can take a bubble bath, curl up with a book or just go to bed early. If I’m really sore or tight from a workout, or life in general, I can stretch throughout my day or plan to make a Yin Yoga class (this class is heaven if done right).

I also know that wine is not a good idea if I’m stressed to the max or depressed. I know that Happy Hour type of events aren’t the best for my sleep patterns on “school-nights”. I know that cooking dinner is way more satisfying than grabbing something quickly, however there will always room for take out! I know that a properly placed playlist can have me in a better mood in a matter of a few songs.

I have heard this concept being called the Mind/Body Compass. The coolest thing about this concept is learning that your body will tell you what it needs, you just have to listen. Are you always tired? Track your sleep and see if you simply need more or better quality sleep. Are you struggling to stick to your workout plan? Is it again because you’re too tired and need better sleep? Is it because you wait til the end of the day and no longer have the motivation or willpower to make it happen? Are you stressed to the max? Maybe taking a yoga or meditation class will help. Or again maybe you just need more sleep. If you spend some time listening to what you need you can then start to develop a game plan to make the necessary changes. Figure out the why and you can begin to move beyond just dealing with the feelings.

We are in charge of what happens in our lives. No one is going to willingly come and take care of us. I spent a long time playing the victim and blaming outside sources for certain situations in which I consistently found myself. Depression and anxiety played a huge role in that for me, but as soon as I realized that I was in fact dealing with depression and anxiety, I was able to figure out what made it better and what made it worse. I began using my self-care strategies to combat those gross depression feelings and have been able to completely change my overall depression story. While I still struggle occasionally, I can now keep myself from going all the way down the rabbit hole, just by listening to what my body needs. Be kind to yourself and take things slow, but make sure you are listening.

Self Care Summer Challenge

I have been on a serious self care kick, ever since I realized how much it can help with breaking old habits and creating new ones. I started taking bubble baths instead of drinking wine in the evenings. I started having mini dance parties in the living room when I was feeling sluggish and unmotivated. I started drinking hot lemon water in the mornings before I had coffee. I began a meditation practice. I did all of these things to help create more love in my life.

Don't get me wrong, I have a very loving group of friends and family but I still wasn't feeling all the love. I still have lots of days where I struggle with loneliness and stress over creating real connections with people, more than the superficial "how's the weather?" conversations. I still have days of struggling to live up to the personal trainer expectations I imagine that society has placed on me. I struggle with understanding depression and how I can make its effects better or worse with my coping mechanisms. I struggle with feeling that I am enough.

So how are bubble baths and hot lemon water suppose to help all of that? Well its simple really... "When we attack ourselves, we attack the world; when we love ourselves, we love the world." You've heard all of the other sayings too... "You can't love someone else until you love yourself." "You can't help to fill other cups if your cup is empty." But if we break it down to the most basic level its this... self-care, and extreme self-care when necessary, helps you to feel better. When you feel better you project a greater sense of positivity and happiness which spreads to the ones around you. This can work the other way too. When you neglect yourself and don't take care of your mind/body/soul the tendency is to live in discomfort, sadness, confusion, and negativity, which also spreads to those around you, resulting in less than stellar moments with the one's you spend the most time with, like friends, co-workers and family. No bueno.

Choosing to show yourself care and love on a daily basis will not only provide yourself with what you need (nourishment, joy, rest, companionship) but will also help to create the habit of checking in with a concept known as the mind/body compass. This simple act helps you to evaluate where you are physically, mentally, and emotionally each day. This process is and of itself an act of self care. Additionally, you will learn to stop looking elsewhere for what you need. You will become the source of love and light that you need to be happy. 

So what is considered self care? It is any act that creates nourishment to your mind/body/soul, and does not harm us in any way. Everyone's list will look different but here is what mine looks like.

• Take a bubble bath
• Walk or play with my dogs
• Make a cup of tea
• Go for a long walk/run by myself
• Read in a quiet space
• Meditate
• Get a massage
• Paint my nails or get a mani/pedi
• Make a healthy meal or meal prep
• Get out into nature - I regularly need to put my feet in the dirt!
• Dance in the living room, kitchen, or any where! (This is a regular one for me.)
• Take a nap (This one can boarder on unhealthy when I'm stressed.)
• Journal
• Squeeze in an extra workout or yoga class
• Bake something like healthy muffins
• Watch a movie
• Color/Paint/Draw
• Take Photos (Love this one too!)
• Garden
• Call a friend for a phone date
• Turn off my electronics
• Use essential oils
• Write

Imagine if everyone in your circle cranked up their level of self care. Imagine if everyone was checking in and making tweaks so that they could feel their best each day. And even if their day was totally sucking, they'd have an idea of what they needed in order to relax and feel a little better, if even just a little bit. Imagine if all of these happy people interacted together to create one big happy group. Doesn't that seem amazing? This is why I am pushing a Self Care Summer with my clients. This is why it is a regular part of my day. 

I'll leave you with a quote. It's on a sign at the yoga studio where I'm currently getting certified (Warrior One!! Yaaassssss!) and I've read it multiple times, thought it was a good concept and enjoyed it. But, it just made so much sense as I was writing this. 

"Your spark can become a flame and change everything."

                                                                            - Ed Nixon (American Civil Rights Leader)

Use What You Have Workouts... Camping

“Start where you are.Use what you have. Do what you can. ”

— Arthur Ashe

I love this quote. So many times I have the urge to post-pone any actions until I am completely ready, until I have enough time or enough money, or until I know I can do it just right. The problem with this thought process is that the perfect moment can take a very long time to show or perhaps never show at all. Instead of waiting for the stars to align, I have found that if you just get started the rest starts to fall into place for you. 

This idea applies to health and wellness in such an awesome way. You don't need to have the latest gadget, the perfect workout, or the cleanest diet plan in order to start making changes. Just start moving and slowly you will see how new experiences will fall at your feet, begging for you to kick it up a notch!!

Below is an example of a workout I whipped up using a pair of dumbbells and a picnic table while I was on a recent camping trip. Don't have dumbbells? Use canned goods or water bottles.  

Don't sweat the petty stuff and don't pet the sweaty stuff!! - Enjoy :)

Do this everyday.

I have been known to say, or should I say hashtag, #sweateveryday. I prefer this to "workout everyday" because when people hear the word workout they tend to get overwhelmed, thinking that this means they need to spend an hour at the gym or run a long distance, or attend a 90 minute yoga class EVERYDAY! When you break it down to simply doing something that makes you sweat everyday, this allows for your activity to align with your fitness level and takes away some of the loftiness of having to exercise everyday. 

This thought process can be applied to many different aspects of life but there are three areas that I would like for you to try and apply it to EVERYDAY! Everyday you should aim to do something to nurture your Mind, Body and Spirit. I understand that our to-do lists are already so jam packed but again, this doesn't have to be lengthy and time consuming, and more often than not these tasks will help to give you more energy, remain more focused and help you to have a more efficient day. Additionally, many of these overlap, helping to nurture more than one area. 

MIND

This area has always been at the forefront for me, possibly even more than nurturing the body. I love to learn and have a bad habit of looking up facts that I don't know the answers to in the middle of a conversation. Thank you Google. Sorry friends that I am in conversation with. Here are some simple ways to make sure that you are keeping your mind healthy on a daily basis.

• Meditation - This one seems daunting, but with the help of short guided mediations that you can find online, 5 minutes of mediation can do wonders. Just like anything else the more you do it the easier it becomes to turn off your mind and get a moment of peace. The simple act of following my breath in and out as I breathe has done wonders for my anxiety issues that I have suffered in the past. I use an App called Calm.com and I love it. I have also found others that I like on Spotify. (Mind, Body and Spirit)
• Read - Reading has been proven to be beneficial in so many ways. Not only is it entertaining and educational, it can help you to relax and sleep better (unlike TV and Computers which stimulate), and it can keep your mind sharp with the added possibility of defending your brain from Alzheimer's disease. Not sure what to read? Ask a friend or coworker for some recommendations and I am sure they will have a short list for you to try and possibly even borrow. (Mind and Body)
• Play Games - Card games, board games, logic and puzzle games all force you to strategize and think, keeping your mind in tip top shape. 

BODY

This is an easier area for me, but only because I adopted the "sweat everyday" mentality a long time ago. One day I will attend a 90 minute yoga class, the next I will have a five song dance party in my kitchen with my pups while I cook. Keep it simple and most of all fun.

• Sweat - Walk, jog, run, dance, swim, bike, skip, jump rope, hike, canoe, surf, skate, hoola hoop, climb stairs, climb trees, climb mountains, lift weights, stretch, do yoga, do an exercise video or class, 10/20/30 through out your day (10 push ups, 20 squats, 30 crunches or 30sec plank hold), play with your kids or pets. Vary these activities throughout your week for best results, choosing some longer activities and some shorter based on your allotted time. (Body and Mind)
• Hydrate - I cannot stress this enough. When people say they don't like drinking water or they just don't think about it, I tend to get really fired up. Forget about it being good for you for just one minute and realize how lucky you are to even have clean drinking water. According to dosomething.org, 884 Million people in the world lack access to safe water sources. Do you understand how for granted we take having access to water from a faucet or a store and not have to travel miles to get water from a semi-polluted source for your daily activities (hygiene, hydration, cooking)? Even if you don't like it, drink it in appreciation for your life and your body!! Just do it already. Another reason that everyone should drink more water is that dehydration can cause sleepiness. Anyone here ever too tired throughout their day and could use some extra energy? I rest my case. (Body and Mind)
• Sleep - Again, I sense some eye rolling here. Sleep is the time in which our bodies, and our minds reboot from a long day of activity. If you do not give yourself the proper amount of time to sleep (shoot for 7-9 hours) your mind and body never get to sort through the day before and recharge for the next day. Results of lack of sleep include but are not limited to: lack of alertness, impaired memory, relationship stress, and QUALITY OF LIFE!! What's more important than the quality of your life?? Do what ever needs to be done to create a sleep pattern that supports your MIND and your BODY.

SPIRIT

No matter what your spiritual beliefs are, the following activities will help to keep the one body that we have in optimum health. 

• Be Still - Meditation, prayer, and yoga all intend to quiet your mind from the incessant chatter that occurs inside us everyday. Take a few moments to sit and do nothing. This allows the universe, God, or a higher being to open your spirit to new possibilities. Don't believe me? Try it out for a few weeks and see what happens.
• Spend Quality Time - By quality time I mean time in which you can actually connect with one another. Not watching TV or amidst the hustle and bustle of a crowded place, but in a place where you are free to talk and listen to one another. Go for a hike, listen to easy going music, make a meal together. Also, analyze the people that you are spending that quality time with. Are they people that feed your soul or suck it dry? Life is too short and quality time is too scarce to be spent with people that leave you feeling tired or stressed.
• Play the Smile Game - I often see how many random people I can get to smile throughout my day. There are a lot of people that feel they don't have much to smile about or that are having a stressful day and there is nothing better than breaking their day of worry and sadness with a friendly smile, a gracious "Thank You", and even a chuckle from an oh-so-corny joke or pun (my specialty).

While there are many other activities that help to nurture your Mind, Body, and Soul but this list is filled with ones that overlap, making it easier to nurture all three as well as ones that are so easy that you can squeeze them into a busy schedule.

"Nurture your mind with great thoughts, your body with sweaty fun, and your spirit with both stillness and laughter, EVERYDAY." 

Break up with your bad habits.

Have you ever been through a break up? I have and I know it is not easy. Having to change your life in one fell swoop, where you live, your social circle, your normal routines, it's no joke. Majority of the time the reason this change is so hard is because of the familiarity of the relationship. No longer having access to that comfort zone sucks!

This is the same reason that we continue to put up with our bad habits. Skipping exercise, procrastination, overeating, overspending, living beyond our means, hoarding, binge drinking, and many more, are all habits that we continue even though they bring us no good and leave us depressed and filled with guilt. All because we know what to expect from them, we are comfortable in this crappy familiar comfort zone.

A break up pushes us out of that comfort zone, forcing us to make new routines and a new level of familiarity. If you have been through a break up and weeks, months, or years later, realized that it was for the best, that it allowed you to let someone else into your life that made you feel fantastic and filled your life with positivity, then you might be able to understand how kicking a bad habit to the curb might also give you that same feeling. If you haven't, well you're just going to have to trust the process. I'm sure someone in your life has gone through a break up and been super happy that they did. 

This is my challenge to you, and to myself... pick one bad habit that you know you should have "the talk" with. Sit down and either mentally, or even on paper, tell that bad habit that you are no longer going to put up with it's bullshit and that it is time to go your separate ways. Then make a game plan to find a better habit that will fill you will positivity and pride. No sitting on the couch with ice cream and a sad movie, we already know that this will be for the better!!

For example... Let's say that the bad habit we'd like to break up with is sleeping in and then missing our exercise for the day. After telling Sleeping In, "It's not you, it's me" (although we all know that it really is YOU), pack up their crap and throw it away. Then develop your new habit game plan. There is no such thing as Match.com for healthy habits so you actually have to make this happen.

1. Go to bed a little earlier so that you have extra sleep, making it easier to get up.
2. Set out your workout clothes, or even sleep in them, making it easier to start exercising.
3. Pick out your work clothes and get them ready before bed, making it easier to get ready.
4. Pick your exercise or even plan to meet up with a buddy, making it easier to accomplish.
5. Set your alarm with an energizing song that pumps you up and then start dreaming of how awesome you will feel, not just after your workout but all day long!

"Out with the old and in with the new." "One door closes and another opens." These are phrases that embody the idea of ridding your life of people and/or things that bring you down and contribute negative thoughts and feeling to your life and replacing them with ones that pump you full of energy and leave you with butterflies and happiness, just like the kisses from a new someone special. 

Ladies Who Lunge Workout Playlist

I was asked twice this week what kind of music I like to listen to when I workout. I am super motivated by music. If I enjoy the music, my workouts fly by. I use Spotify to create my own playlists, that are tailored to my tastes, which includes a little rock, some that border on punk, pop, and some that float on the electronic side. Either way, I thought I would share one of my current faves. It is my Ladies Who Lunge playlist that is filled with all kinds of music with bad ass chicks taking the lead!!

Warning, there are some lovely expletives in some of the songs :)